Distant Memories
by Me The Cat
Summary: She remembers the warmth of his hand and the soft pressure of his lips. She remembers because she never ever wants to forget.


**Memoria**

A/N: Thank you Julia for being a human dictionary

She remembers.

She remembers the first time she saw him. Small and shy. Nothing like the Prince Charming she imagined in her head but there was something intriguing about him even then.

His haunted eyes, filled with fear and apprehension. He was far too skinny and his clothes made him look even more malnourished. Yet he still managed to gather the courage to ask a strange lady for help.

When she first saw him he was nobody, but he intrigued her. Later her brothers came and told her.

_"Do you know that black-haired boy who was near us in the station? Know who he is?"_

_"Who?"_

_"Harry Potter!"_

She knew then. She knows now.

She remembers.

She remembers the summer before she started school when he came to visit her brother. She doesn't remember what tied her tongue.

_"You don't know how weird it is for her to be this shy. She never shuts up normally—" _

Or maybe she just doesn't want to remember. She's ashamed.

Her first glance of him in almost a year and she ran away. Some Gryffindor she was. The sight of him sitting in the room where she said her first word and had her first accidental magic as if he was anybody or nobody made what little rational thought there had been in her head to begin with flee.

_"Oh, are you starting at Hogwarts this year?"_

She couldn't think, she couldn't breath. Those were the first words he said to her but she doesn't want to remember. She's too ashamed.

She remembers.

He saved her. He was her knight in shining armor but she doesn't have that memory to savor. It's her nightmare.

All she remembers is waking up and seeing him there. Covered in blood and gore and clutching a giant sword. He almost died that night and it was her fault.

_"No one's ever understood me like you, Tom… I'm so glad I've got this diary to confide in… It's like having a friend I can carry around in my pocket…" _

_"Tom, I don't think Harry will ever like me. I'm not pretty enough. His girlfriend has to be pretty."_

_"Harry Potter is so amazing, Tom. You should have seen him today at the quiddich match against Slytherin. He played wonderfully. He's so brave. I wish I could fly like that."_

_"Weird things have been happening a lot recently and I don't remember where I was, Tom."_

_"I think I'm losing my memory. There are feathers all over my robes and I don't know how they got there."_

_"Dear Tom, I can't remember what I did on the night of Halloween, but a cat was attacked and I've got paint all down my front."_

_"Tom, what am I going to do? I think I'm going mad… I think I'm the one attacking everyone, Tom!"_

She brought him there and he saved her just like she thought he would. But she doesn't want to remember.

She remembers.

Holding her breath as he swerved and dodged. He flew high and then he dove until the prize was in his hand.

She remembers bracing herself. He had been so lonely since her brother deserted him, she was going to be his friend.

She remembers being too late. Her brother forgave him and she lost her nerve.

Coward.

She remembers.

Waiting. Waiting to see if he was alright. Biting her nails with worry and trying not to listen to Hermione.

She remembers.

He came back. Clutching the dead body of a classmate, a rival.

He wouldn't let go and he wouldn't break down. She saw. He was numb and his eyes were even more haunted then before.

She wanted to run to him and help him. Ease the pain he was in. But she lost her nerve and they took him away.

She remembers.

She remembers being woken up in the middle of the night and being rushed to Dumbledore's office.

He was there, looking pale and haunted as ever.

_"Harry—what's going on? Professor McGonagall says you saw dad hurt—" _

She wasn't afraid to talk to him any more, she had moved on. That's what she wants to remember.

She remembers.

He was afraid.

_"'Course he's worried, the boy's seeing things from inside You- Know- Who's snake… Obviously, Potter doesn't realize what that means, but if You- Know- Who's possessing him—" _

_"So… so do you think I'm being possessed, then?"_

He asked her. Her.

But he forgot. She thought it was impossible, but he forgot.

_"Lucky you," _

He forgot but she remembered. It was her nightmare.

She remembers.

She was only trying to help. She escaped only to be met with excuses of why she couldn't come. He didn't want her there. Her brother didn't want her there. But she wore them down.

She remembers.

Flying on something you can't see is the strangest sensation. Impossible to forget.

Mazes. Dark. Whispers. Cold.

He was so brave. He was the leader she always knew he was. He was scared. He thought he was going to lose his only father and he did.

He was screaming. She could hear him but she didn't know why. She was in a different room clutching a broken ankle. She wasn't there for him. Again.

_'I'm sorry'_

She remembers.

Joking on the quiddich pitch, his laugh. She saw more of him that year. He was around more just to be there.

She wasn't awkward around him anymore and she could be herself. This she could remember.

She remembers.

Kissing her boyfriend. He wasn't _him _but that didn't matter anymore. She was over him. Right?

He walked in with her brother and she was ashamed because he saw. He saw how desperately she was trying not to want him. He saw what a slag she had become in order to forget him.

Her cheeks flamed and she yelled at her brother. She didn't want to remember that this was all her own fault.

She remembers.

Their first kiss.

She was so exited. She hadn't let him down. She caught the snitch!

The people were loud but her heart was louder.

_THUMP-THUMP THUMP-THUMP THUMP-THUMP_

The portrait opened and she ran.

This time she didn't run away. She ran towards him. She was determined. She wanted contact. She wanted to put her arms around him and hold him. Let him know that for once she hadn't let him down.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and he kissed her. She vaguely heard the room quiet down and a glass shatter.

She remembers the look on his face as they broke apart and he looked to her brother then grinned. She remembers that walk by the lake when everything seemed right even though it wasn't.

She remembers the warmth of his hand and the soft pressure of his lips.

She remembers because she never ever wants to forget.

She remembers.

She remembers when he broke up with her.

It wasn't that long ago so how could she forget?

She didn't cry. Not in front of him.

_"It's for some stupid, noble reason, isn't it?"_

She watched him walk away from her. It wasn't long enough. They didn't have enough time.

_'Come back to me. Please come home safe.'_

Now, standing in front of her window, she remembers.

She remembers the good times and the bad.

The memories she cherishes and the ones she wishes she could forget.

She remembers and a tear runs down her face.

"Ginny?"

She jumps at the sound and turns. He's there. He's come back.

She rushes into his arms and inhales deeply.

"You're back."

"I'm back."

And suddenly she doesn't need to remember anymore. He's there, now, safe, and nothing can take him away from her.


End file.
